Caden & Sarah's Story
Caden's Side
In 2021 I worked in the Emergency Room at Samaritan North Lincoln Hospital as an ER Tech. I then transitioned to being a full time Firefighter/EMT at North Lincoln Fire & Rescue District #1. The funding for my position was temporary, and after 8 months I finished the final tour with my engine company, North Lincoln’s Battalion 2, “A” shift. During the last few months at the fire district, I read online about Growing In Torah (GIT) in Orosi, California, and began researching and praying about whether I should apply to be a student. By the time January came, I had applied to GIT and was waiting for an interview.
I was accepted to GIT and drove down in March. I first met some of the Williams family there on the Growing in Torah campus, starting with Joseph, Ellie, and the oldest sister Abby. Before long I was introduced to Papa Bo, Mama Sandy, Sarah, and Hannah. At some point in the year, I met Benjamin at one of the feasts. I definitely thought the girls were real comedians, and per usual with people I end up liking, I was probably a little annoyed by them. It didn’t take long before I got to know them better and not only saw the humor, but also that they were a good family with a dynamic I appreciated. I could not tell Sarah and Hannah apart at all.
I was able to spend time talking with Mama Sandy, who I came to greatly appreciate for her motherly love and care for all of us there on the farm. I did not get to spend much time with Papa Bo, but I was afraid he didn’t like me very much after I made a joke that I shouldn't have. After Matzot, Shavuot, and Messiah West Coast that year, the Williamses slowly disappeared back to Colorado. I considered Sarah and Hannah better friends than most people I knew and considered their brother Joseph to be a great role model, but I also had no clue if I’d ever see them again.
After leaving GIT, I went to Israel with HaYovel for a month to plant trees. This gave me a better perspective into some of the culture the Williamses were familiar with. I loved it. I read all the betrothal books and watched the documentary, or as my brother Camron calls it, the “Waller Lore.” I was hooked on this Israel-centric, half-Amish fantasy life of holy living and worshipfulness.
Despite my desire to return to GIT, my dad convinced me it was my brother Ron’s turn to go in 2023. And who were some of his classmates? No other than Sarah and Hannah Williams, my two fun-loving friends from the year prior.
As I worked in Oregon and my brother got on Sarah’s nerves in California, I continued to pray everyday for everyone on the farm. Part of these prayers were for faithful and believing spouses for each of them, just as I would pray for myself. I had no clue I was praying for myself when I prayed for Sarah’s future husband. I was able to make it down for all three feasts that year, where I think both the girls and I were relieved to see each other. While we had some family and friends around, a lot of the group we used to spend time with wasn't there, which meant we got to spend some time playing sports and worshiping together.
I remember at Shavuot, Sarah said something like, “It’s nice that we can hang out with each other and talk openly, and that we’re not afraid we’re trying to marry each other or something.” I’m not saying she planned that far ahead, but it may have started me thinking.
Fast forward a few weeks, and I had begun my 4 consecutive weeks of summer camps: 1 in Oregon, 2 in Wisconsin, and 1 in California to finish it off. I was very nervous to see who would be on my team at Messiah West Coast 2023. I arrived and received my team roster.
Counselor: Caden McCall
Counselor: Sarah Williams
Counselor In Training: Daniel Brady
And our 10-15 campers.
I was so happy to see that I would be working with someone competent, and it was during these days mentoring youth together at camp that I began to seriously consider her as a betrothal candidate. These times were very challenging. I had doubt and frustration that I had not kept myself pure, having struggled greatly with lust and worldliness as a teenager and still trying to get total victory over my flesh. But I kept thinking this: “I know that I can be faithful and commit to one person, so who better than someone I have total faith can help me raise my children the way they ought to be raised?” It helped a lot to take the focus off of me and put things into a kingdom perspective. We all mess up, but it’s not about us. It’s about what we do to fix it and ultimately submitting ourselves to YHWH.
I left camp convinced to commit these matters to prayer. At some point we made a group chat with GIT students from 2022 and 2023, where we began sharing our sentences from our devotions. We used this partially to keep us all accountable, since several of us didn’t have someone to do and share our devotions with. The devotional sentences were something that also gave me an opportunity to gauge where Sarah was spiritually. I observed what her sentences were, where she was focused, what content she reacted to and how.
By the time it came to Sukkot, I was sure I should pursue her. I just needed to figure out what I was supposed to do, as I had told many I would return to GIT as a student in 2024. After a great week at GIT Sukkot with the Williamses, I was sure that I could put off the thought of the betrothal and Sarah until after the 2024 GIT season. This all changed when I got home/to work from Sukkot. (I was living in a hotel for work, it was basically my home.)
I drove up to Oregon solo and got to the hotel in the evening at 7 or 8. I woke up at 2 or 3 AM with the heaviest feeling like a brick fell on my head and one thought so loud it was like someone was yelling at me: “Going to GIT for another year would be selfish. You need to start a family!”
I did not go back to bed, I was crying out and praying. Had YHWH revealed His Will to me, or was I dreaming up my own desires? Could I really pursue marriage right now? Would I have any standing with the Williamses? Was I supposed to be considering Sarah or someone else? That day I called my dad and shared these thoughts with him. By the end of the day, I had called Mr and Mrs Barnes, the GIT directors, and Joseph Williams and had explained the experience I had earlier that morning and how I was feeling about needing to start a family instead of going to GIT. I did not explain to them my specific interests, but would not be surprised if Joseph knew. Along with this change of direction came a desire to purchase a place to house this future family. I did this in conjunction with my brothers and my family in the following months.
As time went on I sought an opportunity to go back to Israel, as my trip in October had been canceled due to the outbreak of the war. On December 25, 2024, Joshua Waller of HaYovel left a voice message for me on Signal asking me to get some volunteers for an 8-week pruning trip that would start in January.
As I worked out the details for this trip and drove around Oregon living in hotels and taking care of at-risk youth, I also prayed about betrothal and Sarah. How would I know when to ask her dad? After some encouragement from friends, I set a date (January 31st) and decided I would ask Sarah’s dad, Mr. Bo Williams, by then.
It seemed everywhere I went someone brought up the Williamses. As I bounced between Oregon, California, and Missouri, I would always end up in a situation with someone who knew them: Ryan and Theresa Hagedorn, Terry Smith, Brayden Waller, Aaron Hood, Tim Cam, etc. I continued to consider the topic in prayer.
On January 23rd on the way to the airport to leave for Israel, I asked my dad for his blessing to ask Mr. Bo about Sarah. I had already asked him and my mom to pray about it, but I wanted something clear and definitive. He was hesitant, but I had a feeling asking was all I needed to do. We departed.
My brothers and I flew into Tel Aviv for the pruning with our friends Darian and Judah. We were picked up by Britt Waller, who drove us to Har Bracha. I loved every minute of HaYovel and getting to see the Israel vision more clearly. Spending almost every day with either Josh, Britt, Mack, or Nate Waller leading our team was also a great time to have spiritual and practical discussions. It was funny sometimes when someone would bring up some “old time pruners,” and Joseph or Benjamin Williams or someone would be mentioned. My dad called me a few days after I arrived in Israel and told me I had his blessing to ask for Sarah.
As January 31st approached, my nervousness grew. What would I say to Mr. Bo? Would he remember who I was? What did he think of me? I managed to swallow my nerves and make the phone call that evening. I made sure nobody was around and went down to the HaYovel gym/shop. All of that, for us to hang up after a few seconds because Mr. Bo was not able to make out the garble! I needed to call from somewhere with better service.
After a few minutes I got a good connection and asked the question very straightforwardly. “Would you and your wife pray and consider the topic of Sarah and myself for betrothal?” (That probably better than whatever words actually came out.)
Much to my surprise and excitement, Papa Bo said they would consider it and asked me about my time in Israel before requesting my email. I re-created a Facebook account to send him my email via Facebook Messenger.
My call record shows:
Bo Williams
January 31, 2024
10:48 Outgoing call, 26 seconds
10:55 Outgoing Call, 3 minutes
A day or two later, I got an email from Mr. Bo to confirm my email address, which was soon followed by an email full of different types of questions. I also got a message on Signal from Mama Sandy just saying that my answers would be forwarded by Mr. Bo to her, and she would otherwise mostly stay out of the conversation.
So for a few weeks every Shabbat after answering what I could, I would send what I had finished to Mr. Bo. Writing the answers up, deleting them, and rewriting them definitely led to a few days of sleep deprivation, but I think the result was worth it.
I had sent the last answer not long before we were scheduled to return to the states. I figured it would take Papa Bo and Mama Sandy some time to go through them all and continue praying about it, so I just committed myself to staying focused where I was.
Before long, March 19th, we left Israel and I was back in the states. It was time to hit the ground running! Or so I thought. My right foot had been bothering me since the end of GIT 2022, nearly 1 1/2 years. The past few months it had become painful to even step on it some days. I arrived home from Israel on Tuesday, and I went to see my doctor on Wednesday. He recommended an x-ray. The next day he emailed me that I had a mild stress fracture in my 5th metatarsal and needed to wear a medical boot for two months.
While I was not happy with this news, I was glad to finally know why I was in so much pain. Now I needed to plan for the upcoming Matzot festival in Orosi. Could my family make it? I decided we had to. My brother Camron and our friends Judah and Zion were GIT students. Plus, I could see all the staff again. I got a message from Papa Bo asking me to call him before Passover, which we had reckoned to be on Monday, the 25th of March. I called Papa Bo and Mama Sandy on Sunday March 24th. They asked me a few questions about Sarah and myself before someone walked in on their side, and we had to end the call.
After Passover most of my family and I headed down to Orosi for the Matzot Conference. My mom and one brother stayed back to take care of my grandparents. We arrived on Thursday night, and on Friday morning Mama Sandy messaged me asking if I could meet with her and Papa Bo. I had figured if anything it was just to say hi as I hadn’t seen her yet. I sat down with them in the RV they were staying in, and they asked me a few questions related to Sarah and me. I was pretty sure it would be some time before they made a decision. After all, their son Benjamin had just gotten betrothed!
I was shown to be incorrect when Mr. Bo told me they were saying yes and that I could ask Sarah. If I had had an expectation, it was the opposite! I know that we continued talking after that, but I barely remember what we talked about. I was a bit dazed. As I came to, we had further discussion. Mr. Bo asked me if I wanted to know if she’d say yes or if I wanted to take a chance. I told him I would take a chance, but over the course of the conversation and planning for a proposal and betrothal ceremony, I realized that she was going to say yes. In that moment I was more shocked, scared and thrilled at the same time than about anything else I’ve ever experienced. I’m married? None of this even made sense. Mama Sandy said that Sarah wanted to get the betrothal ceremony done as soon as possible, and that Sarah could probably fly out on Sunday night. I called my dad to join us in the RV to discuss this a little more and to help me find my brain. We called my mom and asked her to find coverage for our grandparents and come down on Sunday, which she agreed to do.
The next 48-72 hours were some of the weirdest of my life. I was trying to learn to get around with a broken foot, attending a feast while distracted by planning a betrothal on short notice, and in general being nervous beyond what I realized in the moment. I think Saturday night was a low point, as I started to get sick and even puked. It actually made me laugh because less than 36 hours later, I was supposed to be betrothed.
After what seemed like some endless back and forth and great advice from Papa Bo, Mama Sandy, and my dad, we managed to pull together a bit of a ceremony. On Monday morning, April 1st, 2024, around 7:30, I shared some words and established a covenant of betrothal with Sarah Elizabeth Williams. We had met each other in April of 2022 on the same farm where we were betrothed.
Sarah's Side
I first heard about Caden in March of 2022 from my sister Abigail. She was giving us the run down on all the students attending Growing in Torah (GIT) in Orosi, California, that summer. (She was out there helping my brother Joseph and his wife Ellie.) When she said something about Caden being a lot like our brother Josiah, I thought, "Hmmm... I wonder if he could be my future husband?" (For some reason, I've always thought/wanted to marry someone like Josiah.)
After that initial thought, I put it to the back of my mind, thinking I was silly since I hadn't even met him; and I didn't want to think about a guy that way until it was time, so I went on with life. My dad, Benjamin, Hannah, and I all decided to go Orosi for Unleavened Bread that spring because Mommy and Abby were both already out there waiting for Ellie to have a baby.
We drove out in time to do Passover with our other family members there on the farm. The day we arrived they introduced us to the students, but Caden wasn't there for some reason. To be honest I don't actually remember the moment I met him. Hannah, Benjamin and I stayed at the farm for about a week after The Mazot Conference. During our time there, we became friends with all the students. Pretty much every free moment the students had was spent playing gaga ball.
I saw Caden again that August at Messiah West Coast. The Lopezes had asked Hannah and me to be the activity coordinators for camp after they saw us being in charge of youth activities during the Mazot Conference. Caden was a counselor at camp. For some reason he was the only counselor who didn't have a co-counselor to help him. During camp I was impressed with how good he was with children of pretty much all ages. Hannah and I stayed at the farm a couple days after MWC. Again pretty much every free moment the students had, we were playing gaga ball with them. Most of the time I totally clobbered Caden, and everyone else
except Joe Lopez.
The next time I saw Caden was at the Mazot Conference in Orosi in 2023. My sister Hannah and I had decided we wanted to be students after getting a small taste of what it would be like while we were there in 2022. Mazot happened early in the season and once people started arriving, I went into my introvert shell. I mostly only hung out with people I already knew from before, and Caden was one of those people. There was a whole group of GITers and former GITers that hung out a lot during that feast. GITers tend to bond together.
Again Hannah and I were asked to serve at MWC, only this time as counselors. Caden was also returning to be a counselor at camp. For the activities, they randomly split everyone up into four different teams. Caden and I ended up on the same team, The Golden Rulers. We had one other counselor on our team, but he was a a CIT (Counselor in training), so I decided Caden needed to be the leader since he was more experienced and the older male on the team. Even though I was older than he, it just didn't seem right for me to be the leader. During camp I got to see up close how great of a leader he is.
Then comes Sukkot 2023. Caden's whole family was able to come to Orosi. I had already met everyone except his mom at previous feasts. When I met his mom, I remember thinking she was super sweet even though we barely said much past “Hi” and “Nice to meet you.” I did get to spend a little more time around his mom when my mom asked Caden to introduced her to his mom. We went over to their trailer where most of his family was hanging out at the moment.
Tanner and Naomi and Abby came with us too. I mostly just sat and listened to the parents talk. Once again during Sukkot, we played a lot of gaga ball. It's the major activity during feasts there. Funny story: One night during Sukkot, Caden, some other GITers, fellow friends and I decided to play some nighttime gaga. The only ball we could find was a very wet one. The gaga pit was very dusty. So we ended up with a nasty, dirty ball. But that wasn't gonna stop us from having fun! One game came down to just Caden and and me left in the pit. At some point he hit the ball pretty hard at me, but I didn't see it until it smashed into my face. My eyes were so full of dirt I couldn't open them. With a little help from Hannah, I blindly made my way to an outdoor sink nearby and began washing the dirt from my eyes. I was feeling bad because I knew Caden would be feeling bad, and I hate it when people feel bad for doing something like that totally on accident. I am aware that I assume the risk of injury the moment I step into a gaga pit, so I totally didn't blame him. Plus, I knew that he sometimes hits the ball high, after having been hit in the face by him on many previous occasions. Once most of the dirt was out of my eyes, I told him I was ready to finish the game. I ended up winning, so it was worth it! My eyes felt like they had sand in them for a couple of days though.
After Sukkot, we started a GITers group chat with all the students from 2022 and 2023. We all kept up with each other, but the main reason for the chat was to send our sentences* each morning to both encourage everyone and to help us to maintain the good habit we had all built at GIT. (*During the GIT program, Mr Barnes has each student summarize in one sentence their morning devotions and then to share that sentence after breakfast each morning.)
Then comes the day my whole world began to change. I flew out to Tennessee for a friend's wedding on March 25, 2024. My mom and dad were already out there with Tanner and my sister Naomi waiting for their third baby to arrive. Both of my parents came to pick me up from the airport which wasn't unusual at all. We stopped at McDonald's for some food because I was starving. I had just finished my food and they told me someone had asked to marry me. I think I said something like, “What!?” My dad then proceeded to throw out a bunch of hypotheticals: What if he wants to live somewhere with no hiking? Or what if he has a disability
and can never hike with you? Or what if his mom is an introvert, would you still talk to her?
At some point my dad finally asked if I wanted to know who it was. I said, "Not yet." They told me that was okay, but everything was to be crazy busy when we got to Tanner and Naomi's (We had Passover prep and a wedding to go to.), and that we might not have another good chance to talk. But I really didn't want to be too distracted at my friend's wedding, so I still said I didn't want to know. On the way back, there were some more hypotheticals suggested to me in the car, but they never said who had asked.
The decision to not know who had asked was good and bad. The entire day I kept racking my brain trying to figure out who matched all the hypotheticals Daddy had listed. During this time, I prayed a lot and I was feeling a strong sense that I was supposed to say yes. This scared me. The next morning I texted Mommy that I wanted to know who it was. I couldn't just talk freely because there were 3 other adults in the house. Somehow Mommy and Daddy came up with a way to talk to me alone in the car.
At this point, I was already incredibly nervous and could hardly eat. After talking about some random things for a cover story if anyone questioned what we were talking about out there, my dad that said, “Well, Caden McCall thinks he wants you for a wife.” I was so shocked! At first I thought, "If this doesn't work, it's gonna be so awkward since we have so many of the same friends." But then I started getting happier the more info my parents gave me about him. It all just seemed so right! At this point I was already pretty sure I was gonna say yes, but I wanted to pray for at least one more a day.
Naomi went into labor that afternoon/evening. She was in labor all night and because of that, I had a lot of time to just pray and think about marrying Caden. I was so ready to say yes. There was absolutely no reason to say no. I knew him well, enough to know he fit all the necessary requirements I had. And I was totally at peace with saying yes. At this point I remembered that I had wondered if he would be my husband back when I first heard about him. That somehow felt like just one more confirmation on top of all the others.
I finally got the chance to tell Mommy that I was ready to say yes when we both were at the Denver airport on Thursday. First I asked her if there was such a thing as making a decision like this too fast. We talked about that, and I told her I was ready to say yes. Then we started discussing how we could get a proposal and betrothal to work soon since I could tell I was already starting to develop feelings, and I really wanted there to be commitment before that happened, just in case Caden decided to change his mind at this point. I don't think I really thought he would, but I was so happy and I began to imagine all the ways this might not work
out. Sometimes when something seems too good to be true, I am sure it'll fall through.
I was on my way home to Estes Park; Mommy was on her way to California for Mazot; Daddy was already there; and Caden would be getting there sometime that night. I had to be at work in Estes on Friday, Sunday and Tuesday, and I really wasn't sure how we were going to get this betrothal done soon. After Mommy got to California, she told Daddy I was ready to say yes so they talked to Caden and his dad. They came up with a plan that depended on my boss somehow giving me Tuesday off and an early shift on Sunday. I had just gotten off work when Mommy called me to tell me what the plan was. I was so excited and nervous that when I called my boss to get the schedule changed, I am pretty sure I gave him the worst betrothal explanation ever! But somehow he got it, and together we figured out a way for me to get off at 2 on Sunday so I could fly out to California that night and then come back on Wednesday in time for my shift Thursday. I really have a great boss! (I plan to give him a better explanation when I am less wound up.)
Friday, Saturday, and Sunday were 3 of the hardest days of my life, and 3 of the best. The waiting was taking its toll though. I barely slept, and I think I only ate 2 meals from Thursday night until the betrothal. Because they were all involved in the plan, I got to tell all my sisters the good news! That made me so happy to not have to keep the secret from them anymore! I just wished I was already out there with him! I got to the airport way too early on Sunday because I was so excited to get out to California. I ended up having an extra 3 hours to kill in the airport. I was a little distracted. At one point I may have tried to go up a down escalator. Hannah flew into Denver from Nashville and was able to get on the same flight on to California. We arrived in California around 10pm.
Our parents came to pick us up in Caden's car. Once we got to the farm, I was able to tell Joseph and Ellie, and Benjamin and Kayla. Then Hannah and I were hidden away in a trailer so that no one at the feast would see us and start wondering what was going on. I think I might have slept for 2 hours that night. The next morning I remember getting ready for the betrothal and commenting to my mom how I had never tried so hard to get my hair done just right for a guy before. Caden's parents and brothers and my family that was in California were in the Joseph's backyard when I walked in by myself. As an introvert, walking into a room or area with lots of people by yourself is very intimidating. Add to that all eyes were focused on me. Somehow through all the nerves I managed to walk without tripping to where Caden was gesturing for me to stand.
Caden had a beautiful speech that he gave, and then he asked me to marry him. He put a ring on my finger and then offeried me a cup of wine that he had already drunk out of. Even though I had planned to say, “Yeah Buddy,” in response to that question, I just ended up saying, “Yes,” and took a drink.
This is the end of the story which was written for your enjoyment, but really it is only the beginning of the story of Caden and me.